“Some days I want to talk, some days I want to yell, some days I want to scream!” I could so relate to my brother’s Facebook post last week.
There are some days when I seriously feel like I’m going crazy.
I had a day like that Monday.
From what I’ve read, it’s pretty evident God wants us to cry out in times like this.
So I did.
On my way home from work I cried, and I cried out. It went something like this: “God, I am so sick of my mind feeling so screwed up!”
Except I didn’t say screwed.
From what I’ve read about God, it’s pretty evident He can handle this sort of thing. He is not a prissy pussycat – He is a wild lion. “Crying out” doesn’t insinuate an utterance of controlled emotion; like that of expressing a concern to a boss. “Crying out” means laying it all out on the table – guts and all.
It sounds more like a roar than a purr. God already knows what’s going on in our minds; He just wants us to be honest about it with Him. And his lion-lean stature can handle it.
From what I’ve read about God, strange and freakishly cool things happen when people cry out to Him. Take me for an example.
After spilling my guts, expletives and all, I heard something. Now this may sound a little voodoo but from what I’ve read about God and what I’ve experienced, He does speak to His children. When this happens every-so-often, I’ll hear a voice. Not an audible one; as a matter of fact, it sounds not so terribly different from my own voice, but says things that make way more sense than what I can come up with when I’m going crazy. And then, after the voice silences, I’ll feel like I was just drenched by bucket-full of grace. Now this is what it said to me Monday (I am not making this up): “Amy, you’re ok. I know exactly what it feels like. You are overwhelmed and exhausted, and your mind starts to feel like you’re going crazy. I’ve been there. Don’t worry, you won’t feel like this forever. Just lean into me when this happens; lean hard.”
What? The God of the universe, crazy? Well, no, from what I’ve read about God, He’s the furthest thing from crazy. But I think Jesus might have felt a bit like He was going crazy during a couple of instances I can think of while here on earth. Remember when He was tempted in the desert by Satan? He was so exhausted after this ordeal that angels came to take care of Him afterwards. And in the Garden of Gethsemane, right before going to the cross? He cried out and sweat blood. This sounds like someone that’s overwhelmed with anguish, exhausted, terrified, and…maybe feeling crazy in the most literal and grave sense of the word.
Maybe the craziest thing of all is that He actually went through with it. He went to the cross. He made it possible for you and me to cry out to Him, and to be heard. And it isn’t like baring your bloody soul to a counselor that has only studied your condition in books. He has lived it.
This makes me feel a little less crazy.
There are some days when I seriously feel like I’m going crazy.
I had a day like that Monday.
From what I’ve read, it’s pretty evident God wants us to cry out in times like this.
So I did.
On my way home from work I cried, and I cried out. It went something like this: “God, I am so sick of my mind feeling so screwed up!”
Except I didn’t say screwed.
From what I’ve read about God, it’s pretty evident He can handle this sort of thing. He is not a prissy pussycat – He is a wild lion. “Crying out” doesn’t insinuate an utterance of controlled emotion; like that of expressing a concern to a boss. “Crying out” means laying it all out on the table – guts and all.
It sounds more like a roar than a purr. God already knows what’s going on in our minds; He just wants us to be honest about it with Him. And his lion-lean stature can handle it.
From what I’ve read about God, strange and freakishly cool things happen when people cry out to Him. Take me for an example.
After spilling my guts, expletives and all, I heard something. Now this may sound a little voodoo but from what I’ve read about God and what I’ve experienced, He does speak to His children. When this happens every-so-often, I’ll hear a voice. Not an audible one; as a matter of fact, it sounds not so terribly different from my own voice, but says things that make way more sense than what I can come up with when I’m going crazy. And then, after the voice silences, I’ll feel like I was just drenched by bucket-full of grace. Now this is what it said to me Monday (I am not making this up): “Amy, you’re ok. I know exactly what it feels like. You are overwhelmed and exhausted, and your mind starts to feel like you’re going crazy. I’ve been there. Don’t worry, you won’t feel like this forever. Just lean into me when this happens; lean hard.”
What? The God of the universe, crazy? Well, no, from what I’ve read about God, He’s the furthest thing from crazy. But I think Jesus might have felt a bit like He was going crazy during a couple of instances I can think of while here on earth. Remember when He was tempted in the desert by Satan? He was so exhausted after this ordeal that angels came to take care of Him afterwards. And in the Garden of Gethsemane, right before going to the cross? He cried out and sweat blood. This sounds like someone that’s overwhelmed with anguish, exhausted, terrified, and…maybe feeling crazy in the most literal and grave sense of the word.
Maybe the craziest thing of all is that He actually went through with it. He went to the cross. He made it possible for you and me to cry out to Him, and to be heard. And it isn’t like baring your bloody soul to a counselor that has only studied your condition in books. He has lived it.
This makes me feel a little less crazy.
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